Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

A black car pulls up early in the morning and slows down by your house You see him pull a mysterious object out of his car and point it at you, The paper boy tosses a newspaper at you

What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

Roses are red Roses are white and I one time saw a purple one

Tony Romo

how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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