What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

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Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

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Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

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A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

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Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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No antijoke here.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

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What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

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What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

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What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

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Justin beiber comment if u get it

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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