Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

thumb_up thumb_down -4

In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

bite me

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q:Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because he lost all of his tongue due to the chemicals of cigarettes.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man was mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he look to see if something stuck in the blades. What did he pull out? Nothing, the gas ran out.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops