Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

Why was the school girl called a dork. Because a whale penis is called a dork, and she identically resembles a giant aquatic dick.

Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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