Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

How many sumo wrestlers does it take to lift a huge rock? The point of lifting a rock just to lift a rock is stupid, so why would you get 3 sumo wrestlers to come out and waste their time.

A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

two men where hunting one man shot a deer and ate it, the other man shot the man who killed the deer and made human steaks. a day later he killed his family. and ate them with his dog. he then grabbed the deer that was left in his fridge and used it to make a fire.

What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are in a terrible ship crash that leaves them stranded on a desert island. All of their survival supplies sank with the boat so they don't last very long.

How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

autistic kids rock

Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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