Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a double whiskey. The bar man says "what's with the long face"? The horse replies "My wife left me, took the kids with her, took everything, I'm devastated"

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Guest what in the butt

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Ask me if I'm an orange? Are you an orange? No.

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What did one Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I would tell you but i don't speak Chinese therefore i have no way of translating it for you

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IKR! and I hear rondo and wade were in a fight too!

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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A man fell in a hole. He's dead now...

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What did the one eyed boy say at the movie theater? 3D was a boy choice

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Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

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What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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Albert your flies undone.

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What do you do if you find blood in your poo? Stop stabbing yourself in the arse with a fork on wednesdays...

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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~Chinese Anti Joke~ What is the difference between American army and Chinese army? American army teach youngsters to use their tanks. Chinese army smash youngsters with their tanks.

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What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

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What do Whitney Houston and MTV have in common? They both REALLY died in the 90's.

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What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

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What do you call a place full of large volumes of random, unwanted knowledge? The usersub on this site.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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