Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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My friend just phoned me from the Boston marathon. He was being taken to the hospital due to being injured by the explosions and had to have his leg amputated.

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a horse walks into the bar. the bartender asks why the long face.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

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Why wouldn't Helen Keller be able to drive if she was alive today? She would be inside her coffin not knowing how to get out

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Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

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A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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