Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

quantum physics?

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

How do you fit an elephant inside your car? I don't understand why this task would even need to be performed. I have never arrived anywhere in my car and thought "Sure could use an elephant right about now..."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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