What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

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How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

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race-car = rac-ecar

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

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Wanna know a Chuck Norris fact? He is 72 years old and likely to die soon

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

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A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

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A drunkard walked into a bar, and up to the bartender. He proceeded to **** the **** until he ******. I proceeded to break down in immense frustration over censorship.

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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