Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

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What did the fat kid get for chirstmas? diabetes

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Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

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Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a black man? It would be cannibalism to eat a black man.

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Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

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Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

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Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

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Q: What did the black man do at KFC? A: nothing, he ate dinner at home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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