Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken and watermelon? He was at home

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Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

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i am writing this because i felt like it.

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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Guy One: Guess what? Guy Two: What? Guy One: I don't know, that's why I asked you.

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Because he had just come back from fighting in the Iraq war and she was extremely happy to see that he's alright

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

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a chicken walks into a bar and gets drunk. the locals then proceed to tell the police because the chicken was harrassing people after he got drunk

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why do you always see black people smoking? because your neighbors are black and they smoke on their porch,a place you can probably see from your house.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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how do you hurt sombody? cut off their legs.

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Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

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A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

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Q: Did you hear that Hollywood actress got stabbed last night? A: Really? Which one? Q: Reese.. um wither.. withersomething A: Witherspoon? Q: Yes. Her. She's in a critical condition.

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My jeans

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What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops