Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

What's the difference between a melon? One of its halves are both the same.

Did you know Helen Keller has a pool? no oh well she does.

Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a fetish for sniffing your shoes.

A baby seal walks into a club.

why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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