- Anti Joke

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

That moment when the worst part of the movie, is when your pregnant wife pees on the couch.....

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

If an oak tree falls in the woods, and the tree has 3 squirrel nest in them, then does a whale jizz in the ocean?

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

A man walks into a library looking for books on poor punchlines. The Librarian directs him to the appropriate section.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

every knight i see an owl at window

How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

What do Hitler and Jesus have in common? Facial hair.

why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt