Q: So I don't get it. Do women actually like not having penises and testicles? Do they genuinely enjoy it? A: Silly boy. Women ADORE not having penises and testicles. You just can't get your mind around someone having different preferences in anatomy than you.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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your mum

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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So a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest of this joke, but your mom is a whore.

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Roses are red Violets are blue My walls are yellow

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What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

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What happened when the man crossed the road? He lived happily ever after because he looked both ways for traffic.

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Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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How Do You Fart Eat Beans

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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Q: What happens after you have sex with Michelle Obama? A: You wake up and kill yourself.

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber's talent.

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Why could'nt Ray Charles read: He was black

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I have tuberculosis because Ebola is too mainstream.

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knock knock whos there make up make up who hahahaha you said make a poo

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If you driving a jetski and the wheeles fall off how many screws does it take to fix the dog house? BLUE PAINT

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

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what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

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Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

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That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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