Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

Why did the teacher get mad at the student? Because he ran over him with a car.

A drunk guy walks into a bar. He orders a beer and the bartender says "Hey pal, you look and act really drunk, I don't think I can serve you any more alcohol." The man looks up to the bartender and says "You're right, I'm really drunk."

What's the difference between my father and my mother. My father isn't an alcoholic

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

What do Vladimir Putin and a snake have in common? A central nervous system, to name but one of the many biological similarities.

Whats worse then a hundred dead babies? One trying to eat its way out.

what did the robot say to the black guy? I'LL BE BACK

What did the white man say to the black man that sneezed? -Bless you.

A blonde and a brunette were hanging onto the edge of a cliff for dear life. The brunette somehow found the strength to climb back up. The blonde was impressed, but had muscular dystrophy so she slipped and fell to her death.

If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

What came first, the chicken or the egg? This is a psychological question which the egg came from the chicken, but the chicken also came from an egg, so the world may never know exactly.

The president is invited to a party at Bill's house. Suddenly the house catches on fire. Who survived? No one, they all died.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I´ll give anything to be screw by you.

. . I am a whale

What do the duck and elephant have in common?? Nothing, they are completely different species.

one time when i bought a sonic blast they gave me a regular? size spoon and i was like this is a huge inconvenience.

Timmy: "Dear Santa, why don't you ever come to my house?" Santa: "Because you don't have parents, Timmy" THE END

Whats the difference between a Corvette and 1000 dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

How do you confuse a Blondel? Tell her there's a demon in her liver

You know that song "FIrework" by Katy Perry? Well, I ate a hotdog last night.

what did the dog say when he walked in to a bar? Bark

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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