Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

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Why wouldn't the baby boy stop crying when the babysitter was in the room? Because he put cigarettes out on him.

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Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

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Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

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A horse walks into a bar. The waiter asks: 'Why the long face?' The horse, not understanding English, takes a crap on the floor and walks out.

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THis guy went into the bathroom with a girl in the middle of party and they started having sex but then the guy has to pee so he does... and then he leaves the bathroom and goes back to the party

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Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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Bro: Aww Dawg! What if they tell me I got da aids? Dawg!: Hey don worry bro, you gotta BE POSITIVE

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A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

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Why did the schizophrenic chicken cross the road? He had to go to the clinic, the poor dear.

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What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

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you know your just like my pinkie toe........eventually i am going to bang you on a table

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Ms Leong Sux

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sit in the dark for about 4 or 5 hours covered in Vaseline with a huge dildo inside of your arse

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How do you stop a drunk driver? With a minivan and family of four.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are stupid. It most likely starved to death when it got stuck in a hole.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

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roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops