What blew the baby's mind? Daddy's knuckles.

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? A: A bus stop

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Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Exactly what he had asked for because UNICEF do a wonderful job.

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

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I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

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I once did __________ (went to Hawaii, drank a whole gallon of beer, etc. ), but then I woke up. Works with anything, and people will laugh.

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Why did Larry the Cable Guy say "Git R Dun"? Because he thought it was funny, and so did a bunch of other people for some reason.

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If life gives you melons, you have dyslexia.

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How do you find the richest man in Mexico? Go through government records and tax files and find the person with the highest salary

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what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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Why doesn't the fat kid have any friends? Because he is fat.

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What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

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The 80's called. They need their couch back.

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You wanna know what's out of this world? The moon

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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