Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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What happens when there is a jew next to you and you are standing on a train track? A train hits you both and you both die.

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What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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If somebody stabs you in the forehead, you are likely to get injured.

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Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

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Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

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Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink without making any grammatical errors.

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what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

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What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

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What happens when you forget your parachute as you jump out of a plane? You wake up.

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Horse.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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a giraffe walks into a bakery, "can I have 101 brown loafs please?" the baker answers: "hmm I've got only 100 loafs is that ok too?" the giraffe says: "why the hell would I need a 100 loafs?!"

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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what do you call a black man who bakes bread? a baker. you racist.

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Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

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ccjcjcjcjcjcjjcjcjcjjcjcjcjcjcjcjccjcjcj why

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? Blue.

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A dwarf walked into a pizza shop and ordered a large pepperoni pizza advertised as $12.50. He gave some money to the man behind the counter who then said, "Sir, you're a little short." The dwarf replied, "My apologies, I thought I had given you a twenty." He gave the man behind the counter the difference he owed, took his pizza and left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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