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a mother cow walks up to her three child cows. the first cow asks: "mom, why am i named rose?" the mother responds with: "because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell on your head." the second cow asks: "what about me, mom?" the mother says: "when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." the third cow says: "AAAAOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO!" the mother screams: "SHUT UP REFRIDGERATOR."

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

roses are gray, violets are gray, Im a dog

What happened to the fish? It drowned

Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

what do you call people who keep reffering to the holocost , and cancer sufferers on this site? sad and sick individuals

The doctor woke up and the hooker he screwed told him she had the clap and he said thats the least of your problms bitch you have aids

Sprechen zie deutsche? nein!

It only takes one drink to get me drunk.

Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

I went up to my friend and she said to me, "Foop." I calmly went to the nearest teacher and told her that Susie is having a mental breakdown again

Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

What did the rabbi say at the party? Mazel Tov.

How do you scare a black man? You dont

What do you say to a womam with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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