Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? -Who's there? Not the girl.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did the dog die? He was put down.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call 10 old black people in a barn? Used farm equipment

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I enjoy Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -3

how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What does a black man do when drives up to a STOP sign? Stops.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's orange and sticky? An orange. What's red and sticky? My stool - is that normal?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Jack and Jeff went up a hill to fetch a pail of water, They both turned gay, and had some sex, and now they have HIV

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Seven was black

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust? What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's invisible and smells like carrots ? Rabbit Farts

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the black guy so good at basketball? Because he practiced.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Santa get stuck up a chimney? Because there was a family of possums living up there. They ripped his face off.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops