A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

How do you make a little boy cry? Slap the cookie out of his hand.

Why did the nun cry? 12 babies were killed under her care.

"Doctor, doctor, I am having a hard time controlling my muscles!" "It's Lesche-Nyhan Syndrome, this is a genetic terminal illness...i'm sorry."

Your mom is so poor that her boobs are real.

Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Your momma's so dumb she graduated high school with a C average.

violets are green roses are purple this makes total sense, cheeseburger

what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

"knock knock" "whos there?" there was no response from the other side but the knocking continued, the homeowner felt distressed so phoned the police...

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

"knock knock" "who's there" "I dont know, check the door"

What is black white green blue and is wet and blind and deaf and homosexual all at the same time? What ever I just described

A sober Amy Winehouse

Q: What did the racoon say to the cow? A: Nothing, because neither have the extansive intillect to speak in a manner that the other would understand.

Why is there such a big box because there is some writing down here :)

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck had AIDS?

what's worse than both your parents dying? finding out that they were hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and they left you nothing, including the house, oh and you have to be out by the end of the week, the bank is ready to re-possess the house, especially since your parents haven't paid the mortgage for 8 months. oh, by the way, happy birthday! written by KA

Why was the sock sad? Impossible. Socks dont have emotions.

What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

Why did the guy playing Monopoly sell Boardwalk for $100 to the woman wearing an exotic outfit which shows off her boobs but wouldn't sell Boardwalk for $1000 to the other person that was playing the game? The other person had Park Place as well which would have given them a monopoly on the blue property if he had sold it to that person. And $100 is all the girl had or he would have asked for more but he needed the $100 in order to pay this other player and keep himself from going bankrupt after landing on one of his Hotels.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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