Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a tire swing? A: I don't have a tire swing hanging in my backyard.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

whats worse than dying alone? dying with a boner.

It's only racist if you consider them people.

Q-- Why did the boy stop playing football? A -- He had to go for his tea

Why can't Sally use the swings? Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there?? ... Not Sally.

Q: Why does my arm itch? A: I got bit on the arm by a mosquito

A Duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'd like to buy some peanuts." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't sell peanuts." The duck turns around and leaves.

black people - basketball rednecks- nascar mexicans- soccer asians- uuuuuh I don't know can i get a hint

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

Why are Asians such bad drivers? They're not: it is a racist stereotype that is propagated by people who are so insecure that they must put others down to feel good about themselves.

How do you make a little girl laugh. You tell her something funny.

what's 9+10? 19, not 21

Guess What? What? The gludeus maximus of an avian farm bird

what did the black man eat for dinner? whatever his wife makes for him to eat

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why was't the Elephant allowed on the Airplane? He didn't have a boarding pass

How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but she had a very muscular vagina.

Are you from Tennessee? Because you smell like crystall meth.

While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

*you're

What you reading? reading?

What happened when the prisoner dropped the soap? He picked it up.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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