Quick its the weed hide the cops! ... wait...

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Nothing, we eat pizza and we respect Jews.

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

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How many dead babes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? its not possible because there all dead

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What is yellow, smooth, and dangerous? Shark-infested custard

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Not again!"

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A fast car that's painted red and green...

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What did the little girl do with her puppy? She killed it.

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LIFE :(

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Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

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What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

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The Pittsburgh Pirates

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What happened to the man who lost his left arm, left leg and eye in an accident? I expect he claimed insurance, assuming he was prudent enough to insure himself, or his workplace complied with legislation.

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What happened to the man who worshiped Satan when he died? He died.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? It's illegal to eat the Jew.

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What should you do when a man carrying a stuffed tortoise tries to break into your house? Call the police.

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

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What did the gay guy get at the grocery store? A tub of Häagen-Dazs ice cream because he thought he deserved a treat.

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How do you protect yourself from fire? Kill an orphan and nail its bones to your skin.

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7

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Do you think the death man heard the one about, oh wait I bet he didn't

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Your mom.

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What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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