Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the next joke.

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

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,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

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knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

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What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

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Five guys in white sheets chase a black man down the street. It is Halloween and all six people are close friends and enjoy goofing around.

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What did the blonde order in the restaurant? A cup of coffee.

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Why did the white guy sit on the toilet? So he could take a poop.

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A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

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Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

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Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

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Christ is a conspiracy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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