how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse replies: "my wife has terminal cancer."

Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

What's brown and sticky A stick

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

Steve Jobs is alive.

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

a. why? b. because I wanted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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