How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down +13

knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Haikus are easy Im happy when I write them Thats pretty much it

thumb_up thumb_down +13

There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the woman have no boobs? Breast cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +13

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops