Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

When I became a WoMan, no, its a nice subject, I do not mind at all.

How do you protect yourself from fire? Kill an orphan and nail its bones to your skin.

who is smarter than a human? a nerd

A blind man cant see this joke, so I probably shouldnt write it..

In soviet Russia...things are different

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

i like my coffee like i like my women... Without a penis

What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

how do you punish hellen keller? you can't she's dead

whats worse than the smell of nail polish? burning jews.

Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

Hi my name is Lisa Hi Lisa my name is Karen. Nice to meet Karen Likewise...

A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

What's the difference between an ant and a dinosaur? They are both birds, apart from the ant and the dinosaur

What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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