What did the penguin say to the peacock? Die, you homosexual!

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What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

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How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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Why did Jimmy fall of his tractor? Because Jimmy doesn't have any arms or legs...Why doesn't Jimmy have any arms and legs? Cause Jimmy is a potato.

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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Japan

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Connor is such a dope, he doesn't even know Betty White jokes aren't funny.

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Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

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why did the boy laugh? cause he was reading this joke!

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What happened to the vegetarian when he tried outdoor survival He died due to lack of energy because of his refusal to eat meat and or any living substance

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Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

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Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

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Do you know what a rhino really is? It is a really fat and oversized unicorn

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Q: a black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? A: The mexican. They're going to the bookstore to get some books.

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"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

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What's green and red? A frog in a blender

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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A horse enters a bar. The bartender looks at the horse and says "Why the harness?"

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Why did the most interesting man in the world refuse to eat his buttered toast? It just so happens that the cook accidentally used stale bread, causing it to taste unsatisfactory.

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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