Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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I'm Polish.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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A white man and a drunken black man enters the bar, the bartender calls the cop and the black man is dragged into the police car. The black man screams YOU ARE RACIST! YOU DAMN RACISTS! The cops tell him he has been walking around the streets naked the last 2 days... Oooh... I am really sorry sir says the black man. He was forgiven and went sober forever. Moral: No moral, that is the anti moral in this anti joke...and besides I am a W class celebrity.enjoy life

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

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What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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Communism hehe xd

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How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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