Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

relatable: school : 2+2=4 Homework: 2+4+2=8 Exam: oscer has 4 apple his train was 7 min early now caulate the mass of the sun

Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

a dyslexic man walked his god.

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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