Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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a. why? b. because I wanted

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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Knock, Knock Come in

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What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

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Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H2O." The second man, quite thirsty, says "I would like some H2O too." The second man dies because the bartender is a serial killer and gave the man the hydrogen peroxide he ordered. The first man is killed with a shovel.

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GOODBYE

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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