What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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