- Anti Joke

What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

there was a tv sitting on the side of the road.. person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

When you say that Chuck Norris has counted to infinity twice. I say that you cant count to infinity because it isnt a quantifyable number

Apple hates Blackberry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

there was a tv sitting on the side of the road.. person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

When you say that Chuck Norris has counted to infinity twice. I say that you cant count to infinity because it isnt a quantifyable number

Apple hates Blackberry.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

When you say that Chuck Norris has counted to infinity twice. I say that you cant count to infinity because it isnt a quantifyable number

Apple hates Blackberry.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

there was a tv sitting on the side of the road.. person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!