I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is nonsentient, generally heavier and not necessarily light-dark brown colored, whereas the black man is fully capable of thinking and usually has dark toned skin.

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Q: What did hitler say to his generals? a: In a circumstance as the one we have found ourselves in. Eliminating our most threatening of enemies would be very logical. Unless they were of the superior race therefore, it may be frowned apon by our low ranked comrades. Causing another assasionation attempt on myself. So in conclusion I believe eliminating a rich and intelligent race far more superior than our own, would be the best way to go. So collect the Jews of Warsaw and we might have a chance.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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how did the black guy get into school? he walked thru the front door.

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A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

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How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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