What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

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Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

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My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

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The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

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Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

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How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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A bartender sees Jesus Christ, George Washington, and Adolf Hitler walk into his bar. The bartender is drunk.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

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What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops