What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

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I like my coffe like my women Without a Penis

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

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ive been a naughty girl, and i need something to plug my hole. call or text me;) 1 (802) 299-5281

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What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

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Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

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Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

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What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

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Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

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Q:What happens when a bug walks into a bar A:It gets stepped on

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops