What did Johnny get for Christmas? Nothing. Johnny is Jewish.

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HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

how many dead babies can you fit into a bath tub i dont know i didnt get the chance to fill it up yet

I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

i want to watch t.v, how do u turn it on? idk, do u know how? idk either, i cant see or hear then y do u want to watch t.v wuts a tv?

why did the chicken cross the road? I never got to ask it got hit by a car.

Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

Why did the boy who didn't do his homework fall out off a tree? Because his overly obsessive mom threw a rock at him.

What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

What's white on top and black on bottom? Society.

Q:What has more brains than the baby you just shot? A:The wall behind it!!!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being chased by a coyote that hadn't eaten in several days.

Whats the difference between a rake and a sack of dead babys? i dont have a rake in my garage.

What page are you on The gay page.

How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

yo mama so fat she died from a heart attack

Jamie Stegman was dead. LOL

A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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