Face...tastes like chicken!

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A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

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When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

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THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

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What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

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Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

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what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

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They didn't stop pulling my hair i didn't stop pulling the trigger

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What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

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One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

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Knock, Knock! Who`s there? Your mama`s stupid! Your mama`s stupid who? Your mama`s stupid as a rock! I` m going to cut your eyes out and use them as baseballs!

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Q: Why'd the guy have to fart? A: There was a buildup of methane gas in his colon.

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Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

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What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

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roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

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What do porn stars do after they retire? No clue but some idiot made a movie about it.

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Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? A friendly individual who cares nothing about racial differences and instead judges people based on character.

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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