What's red and smells like blue paint? red paint

Make me famous

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

A man was feeling sick and decided to go and see a doctor. He saw the doctor and then went home. He wasn't feeling any better so he decided to get checked-out by the doctor.

Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

Why is the Mexican a gardener? He has a mental disability that makes him unable to do more than a simple task.

Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...