What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

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knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

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Joe: CHOP CHOP KICK PUNCH HI-YAH! Mike:What are you doing? JOE: PRACTICING CHPO MENTAL KICK KARATE!!!!!!!

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What do you get when you watch Cinderella backwards? A woman who learns her place.

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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a jewish duck trips over a series of metal corckswcrews and proceeds to die of ADHD the answer is 4

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ok last night i found a pic of romney saying "if i win the election 8 million people will have no job" then Obama says hey romney now that i won the election it would be 8 million and one stupid.

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i know leaves are green because of chlorophyll but i don't know how to get a mortgage this is the kind if shit your parents pay for

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A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

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A man walks into a bar, and he died.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? No one knows.

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Why was the black man afraid of leaving his house? Because he has severe agoraphobia and cannot function normally in society.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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A man walks into the bathroom. He dumps cat shit all over the floor

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How much wood could a Woodchuck chuck if a Woodchuck could chuck wood? The etymology of the name woodchuck is unrelated to wood or chucking

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Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

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A Hispanic walks into an alleyway and sees two of his rich friends. He desperately needs money and only has enough time to shoot one of them because he sees the police following him. He decides which one to shoot... Wait, if he has enough time to think about this shouldn't he just shoot both of them?

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If you pull a pin out of a grenade, is it possible to put it back? I need a quick answer for this question.

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-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

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what did the dead guy say to the boy? nothing he is dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

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So the priest took the 6 year old boy into the confessional...and He told him to say 3 Hail Mary's.

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A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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