WHo owns a white van? JOSH!!

Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

What would Loiter Squad be if the characters were white? A show.

Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What is the difference between a woman and a whale? One has big whiskers and is fat and filthy, the other one lives in the sea and is a mammal

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? -They're both purple except the rabbit.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

THe Election

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

Your mother is so fat, she is dying due to obesity and it would be utterly disgusting to make fun of anyone in that situation.

Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing

Whats a joke with no meaning? This one

Mr. T watched "the notebook"

Q: What happens after you have sex with Michelle Obama? A: You wake up and kill yourself.

how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...