When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

whats uglyand cry , and screams mommy ... you after i bitch slap you

What do you call a baby that got hit by a train? Thomas

how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

So a man walks into a bar... ouch

A kid walks into a bar and the bartender yells, "Get Out!"

Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. That always nice, you dont want your dairy products to spoil.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

Q: Why did the Japanese man fall off the cliff? A: He was pushed

What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

a man walk into a bakery, he sais... may i have a loaf of bread....

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

Q. Why couldn't the blind black guy read. A. He's Dead

A ship wrecks in the South Pacific ocean. Only one man survives. He swims to a semi-deserted island, and is later eaten by the cannibal inhabitants

There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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