Knock Knock Who's there? a tree

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

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What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. At what point would a chicken consciously know it was crossing a road.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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Badabing.

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Why was the ginger angry with the manager of the hardware store? His smoke detector didn’t come with a snooze button.

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Lucas talks to mom she says hi

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What's funnier than a jalapeño? A jalapeño on a stick.

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What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

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Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because aliens dont wear purple hats.

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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Your mother's breath smells so bad that it just doesn't smell very good at all.

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

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What do you get six year old Hitler for his birthday? An Easy Bake Oven

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I've often heard that a room with a million monkeys with a million typewriters, given enough time; would eventually reproduce the complete works of Shakespeare. This seems to suggest that if something has an extremely low chance of happening, it will still eventually happen if enough attempts are made. However, I feel that the aforementioned scenario, given enough time to play out, would only result in a room full of dead monkeys. Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

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Crime doesn't pay. Sure it does

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Knock, knock Who's there? You... and you just lost the game. -Eka

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops