How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? MORE GUNS!

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Why did the girl throw her watch out of the window? because her mind wasn't as intelligent as a normals person mind as she had mental problems.

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A child walks into a classroom.

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What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

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Q. Why didn't bob go to work today? A. I killed his family.

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What's big, old, and brown? A tree.

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Q. How much Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A. None, they just steal one.

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The blonde is in the park withb a rope a man passes and says what are u doing, she says im goin o hang and kill myself. the next day the man comes back and sees the blonde there alive he says i thought u were goin hang yourself she says i tried but i couldnt breathe.

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What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

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lol

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What Do you say to an atheist after he sneezes? Bless you. Its just polite

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I like playing in the balls. I like balls.

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I'd really wanted to design a car, and then craft some sort of prototype dream car and concepts but sadly, I can't even draw a straight line.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? Two piles of dead babies.

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How is a frog similar to a corn dog? They both have really long tongues, except for the corn dog

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

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Once upon a time a was born

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what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

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What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

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Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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