A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a truck.

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A man with glasses and a cane walks out if a clothing store and accidentally bumps into a woman, knocking his hat off "Can't you watch where you're going?" the woman asks. The man then slaps her, knocking her to the ground. He picks up his new designer fedora, and drives off in his $90,000 Cadillac. The woman, after dusting herself off, gets the guy's plates, convinces a few witnesses to testify against the man, and informs the authorities of an assault. He was later arrested for assault as well as pimping and soliciting sex. He is found guilty in a court of law and is sentenced to 2-5 years in prison, and is doled a hefty fine.

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Why was the girl on the ground? She jumped off a bridge.

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Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

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Why do Mexicans stink? Because they're Mexican.

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What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile

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A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to

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What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

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Hey! Do you like fishsticks? Me too :)

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What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We are here to inform you that your daughter has died in a drunk driving accident.

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what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

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A jew walks into a church. he wishes to be touched by God.

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A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

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a guy was waiting for his date, then she arrived and they went happily to the cinema

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What do you call black people in a pool? African american swimmers

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How many baby's does it take to paint a wall Depends on how hard you throw them

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

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What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops