A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots. They all miss.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you say the big head boy? Brush yo teeth

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A flock of ostriches run into a mine field

thumb_up thumb_down +12

women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

No. Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats worse than shitting in a urinal??? shitting in a shower

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I work for a Jewish Carpenter. He pays me minimum wage.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why'd the first koala fall out of the tree? He died. Why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first koala. Why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game. Why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? He thought he was a koala. Why'd the boy fall off the swing? He was hit by 3 koalas and a refrigerator. Why'd the boy fall off his bike? He had no arms or legs

thumb_up thumb_down +12

My name is actually Nero by the way, or Neron, which means black, have you ever played Mortal Kombat? There is a character there Named Erron Black, which is a total pun on that, there is also a character named Boraicho which drinks constantly while Borracho means drunkard in Spanish so yeah, Erron Black is simply an anagram for Nero Black, or rather Neron Black... Anyway, now that we got your brain nice and confused, I can increase the effect with OVER NINE THOUSAND! So your pictures "remastered" on photoshop or something?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An Asian Woman is late and is driving her car very fast to her daughters wedding. She arrives at a reasonable time to witness the whole event.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Question: What is black and white and read all over? Guess: A newspaper? Answer: No. A zebra that was shot by a poacher. Poaching is a serious problem all over the world and should be looked down upon by all. It is not something to joke about.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvatore Dali mistook them for clocks.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

pineapples

thumb_up thumb_down +10

who smells? •Liam

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the difference between a black guy and shit? One just looks and smells like shit, and the other actually is shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the girl angry? She's PMSing. Give her a banana and stay away.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common? They were both great singers.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops