Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my arm! Doctor: It's because your blind son

Small titties.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Having lost his job, wife, and general sanity, he resorted to suicide by car accident.

"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

Q. Why was the cat brown? A. because it was a maori

What happened when the terrorist with a bomb went into a school. He blew up and everyone died.

Q. Why did the koala bear go to court? A. Because too many people were referring to it as a bear when it is infact not a bear.

3 guys and 2 women walk into a bar and sat down........... good to see both sex`s were welcome in the bar

So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

Does it not sound kinda fun to keep slapping someone that always turns the other cheek?

If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

A person walked into a bar, he saw it was the wrong bar so he leaves...

Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

What's not red? No tomatoes.

What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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