Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

Why was the woman worried? She was coughing up blood

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

How old is victor? Half past dead

Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

Want to hear a joke? Obama

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

there once was a frog with no leggs

An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

Who moved faster? The snail or the blind man? The blind man until he ran into the road and got hit by a bus.

What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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