an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

Why did the man eat the apple? He had just witnessed a cow butchering and decided to become a vegitarian the moment he got home. He now lives in 1st degree depression because of what he saw 2 hours ago.

How many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. It really isn't that hard.

Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

What's the difference between a book. A tree's leaves hit the trash cans

Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

Why are women so obsessed with not having penises? I'm serious. Imagine an ordinary woman out there, who is not doing any of the activities that the women-not-having-penises thing is famous for. But I can pretty much guarantee that under her clothes at that very moment, she isn't having a penis. And for no good reason. Sometimes I suspect women keep up the no-penis thing even in their sleep. Frankly, I find that creepy. Why are women so obsessed with not having penises?

Little Johnny is sleeping overnight at a school camping trip. The teacher goes around to check tents to make sure everybody is falling asleep fine. Little Johnny, however, says, "Miss, I am scared of the dark. Can I sleep in your tent instead?" The teacher reluctantly agrees, finishes checking around and brings Little Johnny to her tent. "Miss, can I play with your belly button with my finger? My mommy lets me", asks little Johnny. The teacher reluctantly agrees. Suddenly, the teacher jumps up. "THAT WASN'T MY BELLY BUTTON!", she shouts. "Yeah," says Little Johnny. "Well that wasn't my finger, either."

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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