I'm going as the joker for halloween

Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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