What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

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yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

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Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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What has hands but can't clap? - A Quadraplegic

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Laughter is the best medicine. No, Heroin is.

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Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

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whats worse than not being able to hear? not being able to breath fvd n avt were here

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger at Terminator: Gaynysis (or whatever I wont bother checking that out) YA NEED TO REMUV THE QUANTANAMO TRANSLACATOR TO RELOCALIZAYSEE THE INTERDEEMENENTIONAL MAYTREX! Yes, Pops but what about the time travel Paradox? YOU NEEED TO REMOV THE CRISTAL PALARDOXAL WARCALIBREITOR IN ORDA TO DESINSTONYSE THE DEEMENTIAL CORDALOXEY! Me: *Leaving the cinema* Moral: If you thought the trailer was like "meh", then you will soon realize it was the best part off the movie... The only part that is meh, and while I can honestly say I dont understand shit about how timelines work in Terminator (The creators dont do it either) Having Arnold Fucking Swartsnigger go with the Geek lingo DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! To explain things to me, NOTHIIIIING!

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

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Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

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what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

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What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

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Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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