Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf or bread. why did the plane fall apart in mid air? The engineer was a loaf of bread Why didn't the plane take off? because it was delayed.

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

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Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

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Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back at her

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What's a ghost's favorite color? Usually whatever their favorite color was in life.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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Why did the christian go into the church? To pray.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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A man walks into a bar. It's a fine establishment. He orders a couple of beers and takes a cab home like a responsible man would. He is then killed with a croquet mallet.

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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I don't believe in giraffes.

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It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

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What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

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What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops